Thursday, October 18, 2007

Poetry Thursday

I took my sorrow and placed it firmly into a paper sack
the kind you get at very good grocery stores
a heavy one with wire wrapped handles

I knew it must be hidden so I wouldn't be tempted
to take it out every so often and fondle it
worry it between the fingers of my heart
like those beads Indian women use to pray

I carried the bag by the handles
hoping I wouldn't hear the sorrow rattling around inside
bumping against the confines of its paper prison
searching for its own escape from darkness

Into the garage I carried it
my eyes searching furtively for the perfect spot
like a dog who needs to bury a bone
a place where I could retrieve it if I must (but not to easily)

There, behind a box of Christmas lights, used only rarely now
or no, on the shelf next to the catcher's mitt and car wash bucket
perhaps in the old fruit cellar
the warped wooden door shoved up against it

Panic rises, for there seems no safe place
so I stand holding this bag of sorrow, my palms moist on its handles
finally knowing it won't be hidden.


When I was a young woman, I allowed sorrows to consume me. If I were sad, or worried, or upset, I couldn't eat or sleep...I curled myself tightly into a ball and let life pass me by until I felt able to move forward again.

As I've aged, I've become more adept at compartmentalizing sorrow. It's not completely hidden, it's not ignored, it's simply set aside in a secret place, so that I can go on with life.

Thank you all for your kind comments and all the positive thoughts you've sent our way this week.

It helps more than you know :)



Blogger Star said...

Writing through it seems like a good way to help heal and move on. Sharing sorrow with another provides for arms to surround us and shoulders to lean on, but paper and pen will always be there to help when we are alone or caught off guard by unexpected reminders that tug on our hearts.

Thank you for sharing your heartfelt poem, Becca.

Blogger Tammy said...

This was heartwrenching and so real Becca. I could feel the sorrow and panic. Healing is a process we learn and yours was shared from the heart.


Blogger Michele L. Tune said...

This poem is too beautiful for words. I couldn't quit reading it, knowing all the time the sorrow you've recently had.

I'm in tears as I sit here. My heart has been touched greatly.

Thank you for sharing and may healing and an abundance of blessings come your way soon!

Smiles & Prayers for a miracle and new beginnings...

Anonymous bella said...

I can feel your pain through your words...
Beautiful, heart-breaking words..

Blogger paris parfait said...

You've written a powerful poem of sorrow that has touched us all. xo

Anonymous Laura said...

Thank you for sharing your beautifully written, heartfelt poem! Again, hugs and prayers to you and yours!

Blogger jzr said...

A wonderful piece of healing writing!


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